Today I f\*\*\*ed up by mistaking a very friendly insurance agent for someone who was into me.
So a few weeks ago, I was at a coffee shop just minding my own business when this girl approached me. She was super friendly, asked if she could sit at my table (it was a crowded place), and we ended up talking for a while. She was laughing at my jokes, complimented my watch, even said something like, “You have a really calm energy. It’s refreshing.”
My brain: *This is it. This is how Netflix romances begin.*
We exchanged numbers ,or rather, she took mine and said she’d love to “catch up again soon.” The next day, she texts me: “Hey! So nice chatting yesterday 😊 Let’s connect sometime this week.”
I’m already planning what shirt I’ll wear.
We set up a “catch-up” at a quiet lounge-y place. I show up, slightly overdressed. She’s already seated with a laptop, folder, and what I now realize was *not* a flirty smile — it was a sales smile.
She starts the convo with:
“So I don’t know if you’ve ever considered a long-term investment plan that also protects your loved ones…”
I died a little inside.
I sat there for 40 minutes while she pitched me life insurance like I was a 50-year-old family man with mortgage anxiety. The compliments? Rapport-building. The number exchange? Lead capture. The “refreshing calm energy”? Probably code for “this guy looks too polite to leave mid-pitch.”
To make it worse, I nodded through the whole thing like I was still trying to impress her.
TL;DR: Thought I was being flirted with by a girl at a café. Turned out she was just a very charming insurance agent. I went to what I thought was a date, and got pitched life insurance instead.
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